My rating: 5/5 stars

“We don’t just assume that friendship is a second-tier relationship; we act to make it so. Compared to our families and romantic partners, with friends, we invest less time, are less vulnerable, and share less adoration. We see romantic relationships as the appropriate relationship to hitch a flight to see each other, toil through tension, or nurse each other back to health. We see family as appropriate relationships to move across the country for or to stay committed to despite problematic Uncle Russ getting drunk and testy every holiday. … while typically our friends are not as close to us as our spouse or sibling, they can be. The only reason they aren’t is because the rest of us unnecessarily compartmentalize friendship into happy hours and occasional lunch dates. … We scalpel the tissue of deep intimacy out of friendship….“

In this very well-researched book, Franco explains the value of friendship and the many ways you can approach making new friends and/or maintain existing ones. But before diving into all of that, Franco starts with an introspective approach. A huge chunk of this book focuses on the individual attachment styles, particularly: secure, anxious and detached. Franco goes beyond simply just explaining what they are but provides an understanding of how and why they can manifest in our relationships. How our attachment styles can play a role into how we show up as a friend for others and even how we allow others to show up for us.

I went into this one cautiously, as I do with all ‘self-help’ style books but I can say that this is definitely a book worth reading. Franco drops so many gems throughout the book – from reimagining what boundaries look like as an act of love to being intentional about our generosity, and even setting expectations. “Unspoken expectations are premeditated resentments’ – i mean??

Thats a barrrr right there!

This was an eye-opening read that provides room for lots of introspection. I enjoyed listening to the audiobook on my short cozy girl walks. Here’s to creating and maintaining healthy friendships!